My mom doesn’t have hope in me. She legit thinks I’ll be a failure. Does anyone out there understand how hard it is on your soul to be criticized on a daily basis, every single time they see you, by someone who brought you into this world? Sometimes I question if she has any type of love for me. And of course, people always say “she is your mother she HAS to love you” , but does she?
She isn’t a bad person to anyone else, in fact, she is a wonderful person to everyone else. What did I do? I’m not a bad person, a bad child.
But, I do yell at her sometimes because she triggers my soul. She triggers me and then plays the victim when I REACT. A lot of people are doing this nowadays. It’s not purposely & I try to control it. But, God knows. That every single person in this world has a limit. I love her with my entire soul and more if that’s possible, but I do regret not having a close relationship with her. I do regret her treating me like crap, calling me names, telling me I won’t be anyone in life.
And honestly, it keeps me going.
Because I don’t understand her logic to treating me the way she does. “Has never hugged me or told me she loves me because it wasn’t done to her. But, isn’t that EXACTLY why you SHOULD GIVE ME LOVE.
Lord, lord knows my son gets annoyed with me because I kiss him a little too much, I give him OVERlove. I
NEVER want him to feel alone, because honestly, in my opinion of course, it is one of the most painful feelings in the world.
It’s even worse when you aren’t alone.
Why am I sharing all of this?
Because If there is ONE person out there who can relate to this, than you understand me & I understand you. You’re not alone and I want you to know whether it’s your mom or not. You are strong and we kinda have to be extra strong because we have to be strong for us and for them because they don’t know how to function any other way. They’ll never change, because the ONLY reason they’ll change is if they WANT to change, and they wont want to because they don’t know better, they don’t know different. They’re very close minded.
Don’t lose yourself. Please
God only puts us in situations that he knows we can handle but at the same time I want YOU to understand that we LITERALLY have the power to flourish or
destroy our lives. It’s all about how you REACT to life in general.
If you never received love as a child, does it make sense not to want to give love to YOUR child? The love YOU never received.
If someone from the opposite sex hurts you, does it make sense to pay with EVERYONE ELSE THAT COMES AFTER THEM, because ONE person hurt you?
Do you see where I’m going with this? Does this make sense?
I’m a Taurus, we are known to hold our emotions in. It’s been 20+ yrs of this shit.
I’m READY 🧠
I love you guys, from a real one to a real one